Tara plunged a glass into the soapy water of the kitchen sink in front of her, while at her side, Cordelia and Fred each wiped a plate before arranging them in a wall cupboard. When Tara had finished, she handed the glass she had just washed to Cordelia before seizing a dish and plunging it into the kitchen sink.
« I can't believe what we're doing » muttered Cordelia.
« How's that? » Fred asked slowly, with a sweet voice while Tara cast an amused glance to the former cheerleader.
« Dishwashing. All of us. The girls. The girls are dishwashing, the boys are patrolling. Isn't that a little bit predictable? » The young woman asked sincerely, with a slightly exaggerated tone.
« Faith's patrolling and she's a girl. » Pointed out Tara.
Cordelia frowned and crossed her arms over her chest, after placing the glass on the counter.
.
« Faith's a Slayer. She's not a real girl » she argued.
« Not a real girl? » Fred giggled.
« It's true » continued Cordelia, defending her point of view. « Always swearing, always looking for a fight, always has bruises everywhere, always wears jeans so old that they could have belonged to my mother if she wasn't so sophisticated. I bet there’s not even a single dress or skirt in her clothes. Or even a suitable blouse. »
Cordelia threw the cloth she had used for wiping over her shoulder and leaned against the counter behind her, before nodding her head to support her statements. Tara and Fred looked at each other with a smile.
« Buffy's very pretty. And she's a Slayer too » argued Tara.
"Buffy" repeated Cordelia while raising her eyes in the sky. « Ok. There's dresses in her wall cupboards. And blouses. But about bruises, fights and bad jokes, she isn't any better than Faith. So my point's still valid. »
Again, Fred and Tara exchanged an amused glance.
« Last time when she cooked breakfast, it is was YOU who ordered her to never do it again » pointed out Fred, while continuing to wipe. « And Faith spends more time in this kitchen than you » she added while throwing a wink of eye to Tara.
« Hey! » Said Cordelia. « She's only ever in the kitchen to steal in dishes, grab food or influence Tara on the menu »
Tara turned to Cordelia and cast her a shocked glance.
« Hey! » She protested.
« Oh that's true! » said Cordelia while rolling her eyes. « She always comes in a gushes: ‘ Oh Tara, I like those potatoes. ’ ‘ Oh, Tara, I'm dreaming of a triple cheeseburger’. »
Cordelia stopped her rant when she saw that both girls in front of her were roaring.
« That's SO true » asserted Cordelia with certainty.
« What's so true? » Asked a new voice.
The three girls turned around and saw Faith's silhouette leaning against the side of the door.
« Talk of the devil and he's sure to appear. » Cordelia grumbled to her.
The Slayer advanced in the room with a resolute step and opened wall cupboards, apparently in search of something.
« What are you doing here? » Asked Cordelia.
« You're not patrolling with the others? » Clarified Tara.
Faith pulled a package of marshmallows from the wall cupboard, which she opened with a precise gesture. She then put two of them in her mouth, before perching on the counter in front of the three young ladies.
« Angel said that as I had patrolled a lot lately, I could have a free evening »
Cordelia narrowed her eyes towards the Slayer then issued a contemptuous sniffing.
« That vampire is really too good to you »
Faith sent her an amused grin while swallowing a handful of marshmallows before asking:
« So, what's your plans for tonight? »
« Nothing for me » said Fred at once. « I'm tired, I'm going to go to bed »
The young lady threw down her towel and after a gesture to her companions, went out of the kitchen and disappeared from their sight.
« And you Queen C? »
Cordelia stared at her from head to toes with acuteness before throwing in a very serious tone:
« I’m not doing anything that’s with you for a whole evening. So, I'm going to take Fred’s lead and leave you all alone with Tara. »
Cordelia added an amused grimace and quickly escaped from the kitchen in her turn, leaving the two friends alone.
« Looks like I made everyone run away » Faith commented, eating a small piece of marshmallow and looking in the direction that Fred and Cordelia just took.
« Hum … I'm still here » pointed out Tara.
Faith turned again to her and smiled.
« So, all alone with you » she began with a roguish smile. « What are we going to do?»
Tara wasn't able to repress a light blush at the Slayer's comment and had some difficulty in not stuttering her answer:
« A mo...movie? As usual? »
« I had thought of bringing you to Caritas to finish your dancing lessons. But a TV evening works for me… »
« I thought, as we didn't see too much each other these last days … »
" No problem " interrupted Faith by jumping at the foot of the counter. « Let me collect some stuff and we can go! »
The Slayer grabbed the half eaten bag of marshmallows and left to browse all of the wall cupboards. Having added to her booty an enormous package of chips and three plates of chocolate under Tara's stunned glance, Faith caught the witch by an arm to pulled her after her.
« C'mon, Blondie, I'm ready! We can go! »
« You're really going to eat all this? » Tara asked, while following Faith out of the kitchen and through the lobby.
Faith considered what she held in her hands.
« Hmm … I might be able to leave you a little » she proposed. « But otherwise, yes, I intend to eat all this. »
« I guess you can » admitted Tara.
Both girls quickly climbed the stair and arrived in Tara's room. While Tara disappeared in the bathroom, Faith found in her dresser clothes that she had gotten used to leaving in anticipation of the numerous evenings that she spent there. She changed in an instant and deftly jumped up on the bed. The Slayer settled on the place which she was in the habit of occupying and wasn't able to refrain from feeling good to find a place she knew to be hers. A feeling of satisfaction and familiarity that she had never known seized her and Faith wasn't able to refrain from smiling to the empty room. Hearing the water flowing in the bathroom, she got up from the bed and sat down close to the TV and began to review the pile of DVDs, which both girls had eventually amassed in Tara's room to the great displeasure of the other inhabitants. She had finally stopped on one of the titles when Tara reappeared in the room. The witch wore a rather short pair of shorts, which revealed her long pale legs and a wide white T-shirt. Faith offered her a smile and returned to her task while Tara settled on the bed.
« So, did you find something you would like to watch? »
Faith showed her a DVD with a big satisfied smile.
« As we have already watched all of the Starwars movies, what do you think about Harry Potter? » She asked with a triumphant look.
But the blonde's reaction wasn't exactly the one she expected.
« Magic? » She interrogated and frowned.
« Yes! Magic! » Faith enthusiastically exclaimed. « You're a magic girl yourself, aren't you? » She added with a knowing smile.
But Tara didn't seem as enthusiastic as her friend.
« I... I'm... am not sure I’m in a very Ha … Harry Po … Potter mood » she articulated with difficulty.
Faith could not help from frowning at the insistent stammering of the blonde.
« C'mon Tara, it's really good, you'll see » she insisted nevertheless, with a sweeter tone and pretending to pout.
"OK" Tara surrendered finally, when she saw the begging look on the Slayer’s face. « You know your not really terrifying when you're doing that? » She added, smiling indulgently.
Faith took the DVD out of its box, put it in the drive and jumped up on her feet, apparently very happy to have won. She then threw herself on the bed heavily, bouncing next to Tara with a childish smile.
« Then, you should take advantage of it, Blondie » she answered. « The rest of the time, I am ALWAYS terrifying »
Tara presented her with a skeptical glance but added nothing on the subject while the Slayer settled herself comfortably beside her. She then tore open the package of chips and swallowed a handful before pressing the play button. The movie started and both girls attended silently - except for the noise of Faith's jaws - to the first adventures of the small witch on large screen. Between two scenes and two mouthfuls of chips or chocolate, the Slayer could not refrain from casting furtive glances to Tara and was able to notice the tension that overtook the witch, as the movie played.
.
« Have you already read Harry Potter? » Faith eventually asked.
Tara turned to her with a hesitating glance and nodded her head.
« And... and you? »
« Yeah. I discovered it in prison. Before, I wasn't really a reading kinda girl… But in prison… Lots of spare time. »
« And did you like it? »
« Yeah. Not that I’m into the whole magic stuff or anything. But it's nice. And then it’s a change from prison life. »
« Not that much » murmured Tara
Faith turned her head and put inquisitive eyes on the witch.
« What do you mean ? »
Tara seemed to hesitate, then beckoned towards the screen, where uncle Vernon locked the small Harry Potter into his wall cupboard under the stair.
« This... is kinda like prison. »
Faith turned to the TV then to Tara again.
« This seems to put you ill-at-ease » she said finally.
Tara's glance returned towards the TV and she shook her head.
« No, no … »
It was silent for a few moments and Faith consciously observed Tara, who tried desperately to seem unaffected.
« C'mon Tara! » She insisted. « I know you a little better now. What's wrong? »
The question had been asked with a much sweeter tone and Faith held out her hand towards Tara, whose fingers she brushed friendly. Tara shivered and turned to her.
« It's just » she began. « It's jus... just … »
But the words wouldn’t come out. Tara swallowed with difficulty and tried to calm the fear that had risen in her. Seeing her struggle, the Slayer spread her fingers on the witch's hand. Then she dragged them slowly between Tara's before letting her thumb slowly go back and forth on the back of Tara's hand. The blonde didn't seem to notice this gesture of rare affection and started again with a hesitating voice.
« When I... I was a child, my father... my father sometimes locked me into the cellar … »
Tara shivered again and Faith's eyes widened with horror when she realized what these simple words could hide.
« Your father? » She asked with a sweetness in which she surprised even herself.
"Yes" answered Tara whose glance was again fixed on the television in front of her. « He... he said that I was going to become a de... demon and that he had to… »
« You, a demon? » Faith exclaimed in astonishment.
Tara nodded her head with sadness.
« Yes. He said I would become a demon when I'd turn 20 … That I would be dangerous … That it was necessary to ... con... control me … »
Silence again fell between the girls, during which Faith continued to caress Tara's hand with her thumb with an absent look.
« He... he was violent? » The Slayer finally asked, without looking at the witch.
"Yes" answered Tara without hesitation. « He and my brother, they were sometimes rough. »
« Your brother too? » Faith asked.
Then the Slayer remembered with horror her comment on the fact of having a brother that first time that Tara had mentioned to having one.
« Oh! Tara! I'm sorry, the first time when you spoke about it, I said it was great to have a brother and … »
« That's nothing Faith » interrupted the blonde. « You knew nothing about it. It's not important … »
Both girls still kept silent, each stuck in their own thoughts.
« My mother wasn't always soft either » Faith said finally.
This time, it was Tara who squeezed Faith's hand in her own.
« Oh Faith! »
« But at least, she was alone » she added. « And she didn't try to persuade me that I was a demon. Though I was one, actually » she joked to relax the atmosphere that had become loaded.
« You weren't one » said Tara, smiling to her and putting her free hand in the Slayer's hair to loosen a lock which fell half on her face. « And no child should ever grow up believing this kind of thing … »
Faith smiled at her and raised her eyes towards Tara. She was shaken to see the tenderness and condolence when Tara looked at her. She wondered for a moment, what it would feel like to grow up thinking that you would become a monster.
« You really believed that you were going to become a demon? »
The witch nodded thoughtfully.
« Yes. I think that made me a little bit antisocial … Well … Not just a little... I had never had friends before meeting Wi … Wil … Willow. »
The witch diverted her eyes, ashamed to have stuttered her ex's name and Faith again squeezed the hand in hers.
« What happened with her? »
Tara quickly turned toward her, apparently surprised by the question.
« I mean » resumed Faith by feigning innocence. « You mentioned there had been something between you two. And as you suffer, I more or less figured that she hurt you in a sense … »
Tara seemed to hesitate and for one moment, Faith regretted having gone so far. But finally, the witch started talking.
« She... she sank into magic » she explained so low that Faith had to get closer to hear her. « She began doing too much magic. And it's dangerous. I... I said it to her. And I guess she took it badly and we argued about it. I can only guess because she put a spell on me so that I would forget our fight. I found out about it and I talked to her. She... she promised she wouldn't do any magic for a week. And the next day, she did another a forgetting spell … But the spell backfired and I realized it. This time, I left … »
« Oh my God! » Faith exclaimed on a horrified tone.
The Slayer had difficulty in understanding what she meant about Willow doing too much magic or how a person can put a forgetting spell on the person you love. But somewhere in her mind, she knew it was an attack. A very grave attack. And Tara's pulled face, the tears she was trying to contain could only confirm that thought. And in another corner of her mind, she said to herself that anything which made Tara suffer was probably grave, anyway.
She tried to remember Willow. To imagine her doing such things. At first, she had difficulty in seeing how the redhead had been able to go there. Then she remembered. She remembered Willow's hard words when she and the mayor had held her as hostage. She remembered how much she had been hurt, much more than she would never admit and she especially remembered Willow's glance, the quasi-pride and the satisfaction in which she had taken to be so tough with her. Not that Faith can blame her for that. But maybe Willow wasn't ONLY the brilliant and kind girl that she appeared to be after all. She too, could do stupid things. Tara, sitting beside her and stroking her hair, was living proof, thought Faith. And at this moment, a part of her was very happy of Willow's stupidity.
« She... she wanted to control me. » resumed Tara. « And.... and I couldn't let her do that. I was just a freak before her. Unable to speak to anybody or to look them in the eye. She broke me out of my shell. And the last thing I wanted, was her sending me back there. Not her. »
« You're not a freak» Asserted Faith. « You know, I'm not very smart or sly or something, but that’s something I'm sure of. You're not a freak. You're a wonderful person, Tara. »
Tara smiled at her and wasn't able to contain a light blushing at the dark haired Slayer's sincere compliment. Faith squeezed Tara's hand in hers again and resumed after a second of hesitance:
« You needed courage to do what you did. You still loved her but you preferred to leave rather than to let her do things you do not agree with. I thought I was strong, but I realize you're much stronger than me. »
Tara frowned and looked at the Slayer with an inquisitive look.
"Yeah" explained Faith. « I, I would have done anything for Wilkins to love me. Anything. You preferred to leave instead of closing your eyes. Even if it was hard. It's all the difference between you and me »
Faith's glance turned away again from her and Tara put her hand under her chin to make her raise her head towards her.
« You were so young Faith. You made bad choices and you had nobody to tell you not to make them. You’ve changed, you chose to change and to be a better person. That took courage too. »
« But... but what if I haven't really changed? » Interrogated Faith, with a slight trembling voice. « What if I can't change? You saw me, the other evening, in the grave … »
« You’ve already changed... And I guess no change can be made without a hitch, Faith … And then, nevertheless, it was different … Angel said you were afraid that I could be killed … You protected me. »
At first, Faith didn’t say anything.
“I would have killed him if you hadn’t been there” She finally said.
“If I hadn’t been there, you wouldn’t of had to protect me in the first place” Tara answered with a smile.
“I’m a murderer” Faith abruptly stated. “How can a girl like you, be a friend to me?”
“’Cause you’re not JUST a murderer. You were. It’s part of your past. But it’s not what you are. Just like you’re not only a Slayer. There is so much more to you, Faith. I hope one day, you’ll be able to see it.”
***
Tara woke up to the sweet sunlight, which shone in her room through half-closed curtains. The witch was immediately aware of Faith’s presence beside her. Tara turned her head slightly to the left and saw that Faith was still sleeping, lying on her stomach as usual. One of her arms was folded up under her, while the other was stretched out on Tara’s stomach. Tara smiled, seeing as Faith had almost snuggled up to her. She sat up slightly and lightly put her hand in Faith’s hair.
After the movie, both women had spent a good part of the night simply talking, at first about everything and nothing, then about the present before returning to the past. A painful past in which Faith had never really shared, except for a few bits and pieces. And she had just let everything come out in one breath. The witch didn't really know how she had succeeded in putting the Slayer at-ease enough to talk about it even a little bit.
Maybe the fact that Tara had talked about her own harsh childhood, with the physical and psychological violence, Faith had decided to share hers. To talk about her mother, who drank so much that she sometimes forgot her existence. Except, of course, when Faith wished that she did effectively forget her. Because when her mother suddenly remembered having a daughter - and it sometimes happened - it wasn't to a share a moment of tenderness, nor to make sure that she ate as a kid of her age should, or that she went to school or that she was correctly dressed. It wasn't either to apologize for forgetting her in their miserable apartment, deprived of water and electricity. It wasn't to promise her daughter that she was finally going to stop drinking and that they would have a normal life. It wasn't to give an ounce of hope that the next days would be better than before.
No, when Faith’s mother remembered her, it was only because she was running out of drinks. And Faith seemed to be a good means to make things better; either to let off steam on her, or to get some more booze by sending the terrorized child to beg for money in the streets of Boston.
Faith could not find the words to express how much she hated her mother. But how much she had hoped a gesture or a word of tenderness from her mom over the years had been even harder for her to express.
What she had been able to explain on the other hand, were the numerous times that she was sent to centers for minors in precarious domestic situation. This only happened when somebody had finally decided to report her case to social services. Since then, Faith has never seen her mother or even heard about her. Since she had left her on that day, and as her mother’s last words to her had been to call her ‘a worthless waste’, Faith’s mother had never tried anything to have her back or even to contact her.
Faith thought she was dead. A woman like her couldn't have had big expectations of survival. But Faith didn't care. And for the first time in her life, she had admitted that it was frightening her. Being indifferent to her own mother’s fate terrified her. Who was she to not care about her mother’s fate? A monster.
The monster who had just been locked in prison. The monster who had killed Finch and claimed to not care about it. The monster who had worked for mayor Wilkins. The monster who had wanted to kill Angel, Buffy, Xander and Willow. The monster, who at one time, had wished they were all dead. The monster she had been and who might be ready to wake up again at the first opportunity. The monster she had wished to become when she was the laughing stock of her school because of her too big, too old, too dirty clothes. The monster she thought she had become when loneliness and despair were her only companions in the minor center, when young people of her age were going to high school. The monster she thought she had left behind when her first Watcher had come look for her, to show her that she could be more than the worthless waste that the whole world had wanted to make her become. The monster which had re-appeared when Gwendolyn Post and then Wesley had crushed between their hands the last reliable tracks of trust that she was ready to grant around her in spite of an already too long list of abandonment and disappointment. The monster she had hated more than all she had believed hating before. Herself.
How Faith had told all of this to Tara, she didn't know. She also didn't know how she had come to talk about her ‘get some-get gone’ senseless nights of sex no matter with who, without love, without joy and way too often, even without pleasure. How the tears she had kept to herself for years had eventually flowed on her cheeks the previous night, she didn't know.
But she had cried. Cried as Tara knew the Slayer had never cried. And she had even let the witch hug her to try to comfort her. And Tara had accepted the trust so offered by Faith as a rare and precious present.
Automatically, Tara’s fingers ran along Faith’s dark tresses. And a sensation mixed with pride, satisfaction, happiness and tenderness seized her, while she simply stayed there, smiling with fondness and contemplating the young woman sleeping peacefully beside her.
*** « Tonight, we’re all going to Caritas » Angel suddenly announced at lunch. Everyone turned and looked at him. « What? » Said Gunn. « Lorne called » resumed Angel. « He's too busy to come by lately and protested against our absence. He threatens to throw a demon attack against the hotel if we don't show ourselves, I have … » « We'd kick those demon’s asses! » Faith enthusiastically exclaimed. « I said » resumed Angel as if Faith hadn't intervened. « ...that we would be all over there this evening » A general rustle overcame the group at this piece of news and Angel waited until the silence returned to finish. « And everybody will have to sing. Even me. » A new rustle rose in the group, concluded again by the dark-haired Slayer. « I can’t wait to see that Fang-boy! » « Even you, Faith » insisted Angel, raising his eyes to the sky. « No problem! » Faith answered quickly, while finishing her plate. « I sang last time, with Tar » Angel was surprised at this statement. Surprised by the use of a nickname for Tara which wasn't a nickname beginning with Queen-something or a simple letter and surprised by the fact that Faith really sang in public. A glance to his companions showed him that they all shared his incredulity, Tara excluded. « So what?» Said Faith, noticing the scrutiny she was the subject of. « He offered me the meal in exchange for a song » « Everything got explained » mumbled Cordelia. « Indeed, this being said » declared Angel by getting up. « We have a meeting this afternoon at the courthouse. And we have to hurry or we’ll be late. Wes, Cordy? Gunn, Fred? » All four got up and nodded. Angel turned towards Tara who began to clear the table, and Faith who was discreetly finishing Tara's plate. Angel frowned and although she noticed it, Faith didn't stop and offered a perfectly innocent smile to the vampire. « We're going to help you before leaving » proposed Angel to the blonde witch. But Tara scanned the proposition with her hand. « It isn't necessary Angel, it's not a problem for me to take care of this. And Faith is going to help me » Saying that, Tara turned to Faith who stopped her cleaning of Tara's plate and nodded her head, with a serious look on her face. « You see? » Resumed Tara on a light tone by turning again to Angel. " No problem " ***
Actually, Faith's help was strikingly limited. The Slayer transported the dirty dishes up to the kitchen sink and filled one with soapy warm water before sitting down on a stool and placing her elbows on the counter. In front of her, on the other side of the counter, Tara had settled into the dishwashing and cleaned plate after plate, diligently. « So, what do you plan to sing this evening? » Asked the witch. « Don't know » answered Faith lazily. « Maybe I won't sing » « Why wouldn't you sing? » Tara asked, while turning to her. « If what I heard is correct, it's possible that after Angel sings, nobody will want to hear a song for the rest of the evening! » Tara smiled widely and Faith appreciated the joyful light which shone in her eyes. « And you? » She asked in her turn. « I don't know yet » Tara answered thoughtfully, on her way back towards her kitchen sink and resuming her task. « Something cheerful? » Faith nodded thoughtfully and put her eyes on the witch's blonde hair bathed with light. Her glance followed the locks which fell gracefully on the young woman's shoulders, came down along the pale arms, travelled along the delicious curves of her hips before continuing its journey by trailing along Tara's half-bare legs. Then Faith's eyes took the reverse path and detailed the witch's generous curves, stopped on the curve of a breast she hardly guessed from where she was, eyed greedily the ounce of face she perceived. Faith swallowed with difficulty while her throat dried out, and she was suddenly very hot. Again, her eyes scanned Tara's body with acuteness. The sensation of the witch's closeness returned to her and Faith got up slowly. She went down at the foot of her stool and made the tour of the counter. She slowly approached the witch, who continued to clean her plates, and delicately put her hands on the blonde's hips. "Tara" she murmured quite low while bending slightly towards the ear of the young lady. Tara shivered in a imperceptible way when she felt Faith's hands settling on her and she turned around slowly when she heard the Slayer say her name. She shivered when she saw Faith's face suddenly so close of hers and when she felt her warm breath against her skin. The Slayer turned the witch towards her by pressing on her hips. Tara wiped her hands along the apron she had attached to her waistline. Both young ladies stared at each other for a long moment, their faces separated by mere inches. Tara could see a shining fervor in Faith's eyes that she had never seen and the Slayer saw an elusive glowing light in Tara’s. An urgent need to take Tara here and now seized Faith and made her swallow loudly, while she tried to contain the uncontrollable desire she felt growing within her. She slowly bent forward until being at the closest distance in which she could be from Tara without touching her lips. She fixed the witch's glance with intensity, seeming to wait for a reaction. She got none. Then, she closed the distance which separated them until their lips touched. Tara didn't react at first and Faith hardly moved her lips. As Faith tried to collect her thoughts and realized the lack of reaction, Tara kissed her. Slowly, quite slowly at first, before putting her hand behind Faith's head to pull her closer to her. Their two bodies came in full contact with each other and Faith leaned even more against the witch, whose kiss gave a burst of pleasure more intense than all that she had known. Faith moved her tongue, with delicacy on Tara's lips and she felt the blonde's mouth half-opening under her. The Slayer didn't waste time to answer the welcome invitation and dragged her tongue in Tara's mouth where she caressed the blonde's one with delicacy. At first, Tara answered Faith's caresses with the same attention before deepening the kiss with passion. The force of the sensation which worked its way into Faith made her moan in the kiss, and the Slayer, in her turn, raised her hand to behind Tara's head with force. Her other hand slipped, almost in spite of her, under Tara's shirt and went back up slowly along the bare skin tearing away a discreet groan from Tara at the time. Faith's fingers lightly caressed the blonde's stomach, continued their progress up to her chest, drew the curve of a breast with a trembling hand and... « Faith, are you listenning to me? » Faith brutally jerked on her stool and nearly slid and collapsed on the ground. She deeply raised her head to meet herself nose to nose with Tara who had interrupted her dishwashing and was on the other side of the counter in front of her. Faith blinked once or twice to get out of her fantasy and tried to calm her panting breath and the fire that was burning her cheeks. She tried to hide her confusion by saying something, but failed pitifully. « I … I … What? » Tara crossed her arms over her chest and made a sulky grimace. « So, you weren't listenning. » She concluded. « I … I’m sorry. » Faltered Faith. « I was daydreaming … » Tara had a frank and amused smile. « I bet you were ! You had such a dreamy look on your face! » She bent forward towards Faith and put her index finger with tenderness on her cheek. « So, what could my little Slayer dream about? » She asked more to herself than to Faith. « Let me guess … » Saying it, Tara got up and paced the room, apparently in search of an idea. If she had looked at Faith instead, she would have seen the Slayer becoming crimson. But the blonde noticed nothing when she turned again to Faith: “ Hamburgers? Fried fries ? Or then a sweet little pleasure? ” Faith let escape a sigh of relief and wasn't able to refrain from smiling when she answered:
« Something like that »
***
« Tara, phone call! » Cordelia shouted from the lobby. The blonde bent over the rail and saw Cordelia tighten the telephone towards her. She cast a last glance to Faith's closed door and went down the stairs. When she arrived at the counter, Cordelia put the telephone in her hand with a sigh of relief. « That unbearable kid has already spoken with Angel and he told me to tell you that it was ok» she added. « What? » Tara asked while grabbing the receiver. Cordelia shrugged in a sign of ignorance and left, leaving Tara alone. « Hello? » At the other end of the line, the roaring of enjoyment which Dawn let out when she heard her voice almost made her release the receiver. Tara smiled however indulgently, happy to see that Dawn seemed to be doing well. « Dawn! How are you sweetie? » The teenager dashed into a very enthusiastic monologue on the last events in Sunnydale, insisting heavily on the upcoming wedding of Xander and Anya and leaving unknown the other things which Tara guessed were less cheerful, without knowing what it was about. After letting Dawn chat for a few minutes, getting some news about Buffy, the future couple and hers, Tara collected all of her courage to ask how Willow was doing. With a solemn and almost proud tone Dawn told her that the redhead was doing far better and seemed to be able of getting through her problems with magic. Tara took the news with care - Dawn sometimes tended to want to arrange everything when it was about both witches - but welcomed it all the same with some kind of relief. Cordelia reappeared in the room and settled herself close to her, without paying attention to the witch, while Tara got ready to leave - which Dawn didn't seem to understand. The witch was again in full chat mode with the young Summers, when the former cheerleader let escape a derisive exclamation. « Oh my God! Faith in something else than a pair of jeans or leathers! » Tara raised her head from the phone and saw the Slayer who was coming down the stairs. She wore a pair of black trousers and a very feminine blouse, Bordeaux, waisted and necklined. Tara, and apparently Cordelia too, had never seen her wearing before. « Another word and you're dead, Queen C » Faith grumbled, as she reached the lobby. « And a blouse! » Cordelia again exclaimed, without paying attention to the Slayer's threats. Faith approached the counter and stood next to Tara, not without having cast a serious glare at the former cheerleader, who couldn't refrain from giggling. Tara finished her goodbyes to Dawn and hung up the phone without leaving Faith from eyes. « I told you that you would fit very good with it » she said to her simply. Cordelia approved with a nod of her head. « You see, you're not just a Slayer without tastes » « She is so much more than that » said Tara, by smiling to Faith and discreetly squeezing her wrist in her hand. Faith shyly returned her smile, under the amused glance of the former cheerleader, who surprisingly refrained from making a comment. Then Cordelia left the girls and went to the training room. « Well, I'm going to grab the others or we are not going to be leaving any time soon. » she grumbled. Tara and Faith remained alone. Tara smiled, when she saw Faith straightening her shirt. « So, phonecall? » Asked Faith, with a little hesitance. « Sunnydale? » Tara nodded. « Bad news? » Continued Faith. « No. It was Dawn. She said that … Willow seems doing better. » « Ah … well, that's good » said Faith, nodding her head. « It's good. You... you're happy? » Tara shrugged slightly. « I... I don't really know. You know, Dawn always tends to exaggerate a little on this subject. She so wants us to get back together … » « And you? » Faith asked, abruptly. « Me? Me, what? » Asked Tara who hadn't understood the meaning of her question. At first, Faith wanted to pull back but in front of Tara's inquisitive look, she eventually explained. « You, do you want to get back with Willow? » She finished her question almost in a breath and Tara sent her a curious glance. She seemed to think a moment about it before answering finally: « It's... it's difficult to say. Of course, I still love her, so yes, a part of me just wishes only that… But another one wonders if we can ever repair, if I could ever really forgive her … » Faith nodded thoughtfully and a heavy silence settled between the two of them, each looking stubbornly at their shoes. Finally, Faith raised her head and asked on a more relaxed tone: « What else did the kid say? » Tara raised her head in her turn and smiled to the Slayer. « She is going to come to spend the weekend here. To see me. Angel agreed. » « She's going to come here? » Asked Faith, an ounce of panic in her voice. « Don't worry, everything will be fine» asserted Tara. « You know, I don't think she had the best memories about me » answered Faith, looking again at her feet. « It will be fine, I promise » Tara answered. Faith was again going to issue an argument against this assertion when the rest of the group appeared from the training room. « Let's go. » said Angel. « It's about time. » confirmed Cordelia. Then, the group went to the exit of the Hyperion, Tara and Faith following closely behind. The witch briefly squeezed the Slayer's hand in hers, while repeating quite low so that she was the only one to hear: « It will be fine, you'll see » ***
Caritas was crammed this evening and they had to elbow their way to the table reserved for them.
« Finally! » The demon exclaimed by seeing them. « You’re all here! Even Faith! »
« Why ‘even Faith ’? » She protested.
« As if you are in the habit of being sociable and going out with us » Cordelia informed her.
Faith grumbled some unintelligible words and the group settled itself. Angel had sat at the middle of the table, Cordelia on one side, Wesley of the other one. Faith sat in front of Cordelia and Tara next to her. Then Fred came. And finally Gunn at one end of the table. Lorne as for him, saved himself a chair in the table end left vacant and left to give instructions in the kitchen. He returned a short time later, a tray loaded with glasses in his arms. Angel was entitled to his mug of blood while the others opted for beers, fruit juices or doubtful home-made cocktail. A generous meal - especially for Faith - followed and took place between bad jokes and exchanges of meanness between the Slayer and the former cheerleader, never in lack of ideas to torment each other.
When the group had finished eating, Lorne reminded them that each of them had to sing on stage. Gunn was the first one to follow this ‘order’, followed closely by Wesley who got a good dose of sarcasms from an hilarious Faith. Once Wesley had finished, Faith, unable to stay in place, decided that it was time to dance and also decided that Tara had to accompany her.
« No, no, Faith. Remember, I am not really a dancer. »
« C’mon, Blondie » protested the Slayer. « You have to show everybody what a wonderful teacher you had. And you’re not that bad, you know. »
Tara shook her head again and started to laugh while seeing the sulky look on the Slayer’s face.
« This time, you can't threaten to leave me all alone in the middle of the bar » she said roguishly to the brunette.
Faith pouted some more, which finally made Tara give in.
« Ok. After my song then » Taar admitted.
"Perfect" Faith answered.
Then she sidled into the crowd and disappeared from Tara’s sight. The witch turned around towards Fred who had watched the exchange with amusement and stopped repressing her smile. Less than five minutes later, Faith reappeared and resumed her place next to Tara, a roguish smile stuck on her face.
The reason of this smile was quickly explained to Tara, when just after Faith’s return, Lorne appeared on stage and called her name so that she had to sing. Tara turned severe eyes on Faith, who sent her her most beautiful smile by way of answer. The witch got up and joined Lorne on stage. He handed her the microphone before coming to sit down beside Angel. The young woman’s voice rose in the bar, under the attentive eyes and ears of her companions. As during their first visit together there, several weeks earlier, Faith wasn't able to remove her glance from her and didn't notice Lorne’s seriousness, the demon staring also at the witch with a quite particular acuteness.
When Tara came down from stage - under the hearty applause of her friends - Faith got up and without leaving her time to sit down again, caught her by the waist and pulled her after her towards the dance floor. Angel’s stare followed them before he got up to get closer to Lorne, who had slightly pushed aside his chair from the group. The demon had his arms crossed and seemed in deep thoughts.
« So? » Asked Angel. « Did you see anything interesting about her? »
Lorne turned to him, sighed and seemed to think about the question.
« I guess you could put it like that » He eventually said.
Angel frowned at this statement.
« What is it about? » The vampire asked again.
Lorne sighed again and his eyes went to the dance floor where Faith tried to get Tara to follow her swaying hips. Angel followed his glance and the electricity which united both girls was quite obvious to him more than ever. A fond smile passed on his face, while Lorne looked at both girls with the same tenderness.
« Faith likes her, uh? » Lorne said by turning again to the vampire.
Angel nodded his head thoughtfully and he returned his attention towards Lorne.
« She’s changed. She is far better since Tara and her got friends »
« As night and day » confirmed Lorne who had never hidden his affection for the usually so surly dark-haired Slayer.
« Then? What did you see? » Angel got a little impatient. « Seeing your face, nothing really happy? »
« I’m not sure that I should talk to you about it » answered Lorne by looking again towards the dance floor.
Over there, Faith had pulled Tara against her and the blonde was laughing heartily at something the Slayer had murmured in her ear. Angel also observed both girls for a few seconds, before returning towards the demon.
"Lorne" He insisted. « Tell me »
Lorne sighed again and made a sign to Angel to approach. The vampire bent forward to listen to what Lorne had to say to him, while casting glances from time to time to the witch and the Slayer.
If these two weren't at all conscious to be so observed, there was somebody who had lost nothing of the exchange between the vampire and the demon. At the other end of the table, Cordelia had lost interest bit by bit in the animated conversation between Wesley, Fred and Gunn when she had seen Lorne and Angel isolating themselves from the group. The young woman didn't succeed in hearing exactly what was said between them but Lorne’s insistent glance on Tara while she sang, then on Tara and Faith, hadn't been lost to her. And the subject of the conversation between Angel and Lorne was only too evident: Lorne had something to say apparently on Tara, even maybe on Tara AND Faith. Cordelia picked up her ear to try to understand what Lorne was explaining to Angel but quickly gave up hearing something, the hubbub in the bar being too loud. The vampire and the demon probably thought the same thing because they eventually got up and went away.
Cordelia tracked them with her eyes, until they disappeared from her sight. She turned then to the dance floor and looked at Faith and Tara, who apparently had a lot of fun and seemed to hugely appreciate the company of one another. Cordelia was literally stunned by the change who had taken place in Faith these last months. The arrogant, taciturn and unbearable young woman who had settled with the group some months before, had slowly been replaced by a young lady whom Cordelia wouldn't certainly qualify of spread, but it was unmistakable that she had changed. And even if Faith thought certainly that the walls which she had surrounded herself with, were still standing between her and the rest of the world - except for Tara - it wasn't completely true any more. Slowly, but certainly, her barriers were crashing down one after the other to let everybody suspect what was hidden behind her mask of arrogance and swaggering she displayed since so for a long time: a pleasant - sometimes-, funny - often-, defender and thoughtful - still discreetly- young woman.
« At this pace, I’m soon going to like her! » Thought Cordelia with a smile on her face, while a few meter’s away, Faith pulled Tara away from a vampire, which tried to get too close to her for Faith’s taste.
Angel’s return interrupted the thread of her thoughts. The vampire went stale on his seat, sank into his chair and contemplated both girls on the dance floor. Cordelia observed him for a few moments, then got up and sat down determinedly next to him. Angel turned his head to her but said nothing.
« So? » Cordelia asked.
« What? » Angel said while frowning.
The former cheerleader raised her eyebrow.
« What did Lorne say to you ? » She asked frankly.
« We talked » answered Angel while looking away.
"OK" Cordelia said. « I got that part. What did you talk ABOUT? »
Angel shrugged and got ready to formulate an evasive answer but Cordelia stopped him.
« You were talking about Tara. Or about Tara then Faith. Or about Tara and Faith. »
Angel seemed to consider the young woman’s words then crossed his arms in front of him.
« Lorne noticed how Faith had changed lately » he asserted.
« And? »
« And nothing particular » said Angel, but Cordelia could see that he slightly felt ill at ease.
« Angel, do I look stupid ? » Asked Cordelia in a severe tone. « Lorne saw something when Tara sang. What was it about? »
Then the young lady crossed her arms over her chest and gave the vampire a decided glance, challenging him to try to escape again.
« I don't think it’s a good thing … »
« Angel, tell me » Cordelia interrupted him in an icy voice. « What happens? »
Angel looked alternately at Faith and at Tara who were still dancing, then at Cordelia whose steeled glance didn't leave him.
« Tara might have to leave » Angel said finally, after what appeared an eternity to the former cheerleader.
« Leaving? » Repeated Cordelia in echo.
“To Sunnydale” Answered Angel by turning again to the dance floor. « She might be needed over there. Things could go very badly if she doesn't return. Willow will need her. »
Cordelia remained silent one moment, digesting Angel’s words. Then she also turned around and her glance settled in her turn on both girls, and more particularly on Faith who was smiling in a way Cordelia had never seen her smiling before these few months.
« Faith also needs her » she pointed out almost automatically.
« I know » answered Angel while following her glance. « I know. »
|
My Faith in you 
